An Unusual Kiss
by QueenOfQuiet17
Summary: It was only a few hours...but it could change everything. Will/Karen inspired by the Melissa Etheridge song of the same name. Now complete
1. 12:33 pm

**NOTE: **Lyrics to the song "An Unusual Kiss" by Melissa Etheridge are included in italics. I do not own the song.

_"Come on, come on, come on  
Over and over  
Come on, come on, come on  
We all wanted this..." _

**12:33 pm**

"What is up with you?"

He heard it coming from the other side of the room, but faintly enough to brush it off. He couldn't stop staring at the empty desk to the left of him. She was supposed to be here. She was supposed to hear him out. She was supposed to let him say the things he didn't this morning. Without thinking, he picked up the empty glass she kept off to the side. You could still see a light touch of lipstick at the top from when she used it last. He ran his finger around the rim. God, he was horrible. She trusted him. She trusted him, and he ran. He should have stayed for the sunrise. He should have said goodbye instead of "I can't." He should have…

Oh, come off it, Will. Do you remember who you're dealing with?

"Will!"

He jerked back into reality and set the glass back down on the desk. Grace had a look of confusion on her face when he turned to her. "What's up with you?" she asked again.

How much time do you have? he wanted to say. What he would give just to tell her everything. In any other situation, under any other circumstances, he would. But if he let it slip now, if he even began to tell her, she never would have believed her. Hell, it wasn't even plausible to him. If it weren't for the fact that he could actually feel her, the fact that he knew what her skin felt like at three in the morning, he would have been able to let himself believe it was a dream. Something that could only happen in the middle of a deep sleep. And it felt like one of those dreams that shake you so much when you wake up, that it sticks with you hours after the sun breaks into the bedroom. But he was there. He could feel her. It stuck with him hours afterwards, but this time, it was real.

"Did something happen this weekend?" There was concern in Grace's voice when she said this. How was he supposed to answer that? He should have said no to that Valentine's Day ball. But she was alone, and he felt sorry for her. Little did he know it would lead to this.

Will realized he let a decent silence into the room. Grace probably thought Karen somehow humiliated him in front of the ones she supposedly calls friends, in order to save face. In a way, she did—passing him off as an escort at first—but he was well over it. But fine. Let her believe it. It makes more sense than what really happened, anyway.

"I'm fine," he said, the first words he spoke out loud since he stepped into Grace's office. "Where's Karen?"

"Home, I'm guessing. She didn't come into work."

"She's sick?"

"No clue. She didn't call in or anything; she just didn't show up. Typical, right?"

Damn. He did this. He knows he did this. If she were here, they would have to face each other, and there would be no denying the events of the early morning hours. And they wouldn't be able to hide it from Grace. He didn't necessarily blame her. After the way he left, he wouldn't want to talk to him, either.

"So, are you ready to go? I was thinking we could just grab something at that bookstore and café on Crosby."

Lunch. He was supposed to have lunch with Grace right now. Life was supposed to go on like nothing happened. But he just couldn't make it work.

"Actually, I think I have to take a rain check. I just remembered the stack of paperwork on my desk, and I don't want to spend longer than I have to at work." She could buy that, right?

"Okay. I'll just see you when you get back home." She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before he left.

Once he was outside the building, Will hailed a cab towards Park Avenue.

He was hoping she was home.

* * *

If she pressed her face to it, she could still smell him in the pillow.

Karen hadn't gotten out of bed since she pulled the shades on the window; she couldn't bear to see him ride off in the taxi. And she knew if she went into work today, she would see him, and what would that accomplish? It was best to forget about it. It was her mistake anyway. Her fault. She should never have pulled him into this sordid ordeal she was forced to call her life. She should have insisted on going home on her own.

Better yet, she should have just skipped that damn Valentine's Day gathering.

Everything would have been fine this morning. They would have woken up together and she would have smiled. She would have talked to him in a voice still heavy with sleep and he would have brushed her cheek with his lips. He would have drawn her back into his arms and she would have felt safe.

If only it weren't for that nasty little reminder of the life she actually has, instead of the life she realized she wanted. That phone call that brought them both back to earth, back to reality.

Yes, her husband was away. Yes, she was given permission to do exactly what she did this morning. But she had no right to bring Will down with her.

She looked at the side of the bed he once inhabited. She wondered if he was plagued with the thought of what happened the way she was. God, Karen, get a grip. You saw the way he left. He was anxious to leave, and he had every right to be. She wished she could do that.

She wished she could be more like him.

Karen looked at the clock on her nightstand, as it flashed its signal that the afternoon had officially arrived. It didn't cross her mind to call Grace and let her know she wasn't coming into work, but she wasn't planning on showing up even before everything that happened. She was supposed to visit Stan today, fill him in on the weekend: who was there, what happened, who shared the spotlight dance with her. She just couldn't do it. There was no way she could play that role today.

She drew the pillow he used close to her, buried her face in it. If she closed her eyes, she could picture him, flashback to just a few hours earlier when things weren't complicated and everything felt right.

But how could it be right when she was committed to someone else?

Karen was never the perfect wife, she'll be the first one to admit it. But at the end of the day, she loved Stan, and knew that she picked him for a reason.

Lately, though, she was feeling like she was stuck.

She just never fully realized it until this morning.


	2. 1:25 am

**NOTE: **Lyrics to the song "An Unusual Kiss" by Melissa Etheridge are featured in italics. I do not own the song.

_"It's 1:25 am. I think I've seen that look somewhere before  
1:25 am, I thought that you were headed for the door  
Then something touched my skin,  
I won't ask you to leave here anymore."_

**1:25 am**

He couldn't leave it alone. The entire weekend played in a continuous loop in his mind. She had slowly let her guard down until he could clearly see a Karen Walker he wasn't used to. One who felt the weight she was forced to carry. One who could break. One who was already broken. Pleading with him to stay when he was at the end of his rope. Telling him he's the only one she could depend on. And then the kiss on the dance floor…he was the one to do it, but he could have sworn he felt something in it that told him that she would have gone for it if he didn't. So when she wanted to stay a little later for one more drink before heading home, he wanted to keep her company. He wanted to see how long he could stay in the presence of this Karen Walker before everything went back to normal. And when he wanted to ride with her to her home before going back to his, she didn't put up a fight.

Maybe it wasn't the way he would have originally chosen to spend his Valentine's Day. But in spite of himself, he enjoyed the time he spent with Karen.

It was late when they finally decided to leave the hotel, officially the start of a new week. Everyone else was asleep, preparing for the work day ahead of them; he was stuck figuring out where they stood with each other when the sun rose. They rode in silence for what seemed like an eternity; Will had figured she had fallen asleep beside him in the back of the cab. And if it weren't for her words, he wouldn't have spoken for fear of waking her up.

"Thank you, for this weekend," she started in a soft voice. "I don't think I would have gotten through it half as easily if it were anyone else."

He smiled at her. "After the slight bumps in the road, I was actually starting to enjoy myself. I know it's been hard, with Stan in prison. But I hope you know you can still count on me. Even if it ends up being our secret."

Karen sighed. "I don't know…being on my own has given me a lot of time to think. And I'm looking back on my marriage, and there have been moments where I know I made the right decision. But lately, I just feel…" She stopped, not because she didn't think she could trust him, but because this was such an unfamiliar place for them, she wasn't sure if she really wanted to step inside.

"Karen," he said softly as he took her hand. "You can tell me." He could feel the warmth of her skin as she strengthened her grip, and when he looked into her eyes, he thought that she was finally ready to let it all go. She gave him a weak smile that told him she trusted him.

The cab slowed to a stop and popped the trunk. They looked out the window to find that they had reached Karen's building. And in that instant, she realized what she was doing. He could see it in her eyes. This wasn't how it worked; they both knew that. But he also knew she would be lying if she said this wasn't a welcome change. The urge to stay with her overcame him; he wanted to go inside, he wanted to make sure she was okay, especially coming back to a reality that reminded her that her husband was in prison and she would stay in a cold house alone.

But she jerked away and tried to rush her way out of the cab. "I can't." It was there. It was soft, almost inaudible, but it was there. Some semblance of retaliation. Anything to just get her inside, alone, so she can figure everything out by morning and be okay when he's bound to walk into Grace's office by lunch. She just needed those few hours. It wasn't too much to ask.

"Karen…"

"Honey," she started. That's when he knew she reverted back to their original state; after the dance, after everyone had stopped caring whether or not she was with someone, whether or not she'd swallow her pride and spend the dance alone, she had called him by his first name, not the generic nickname she gave everybody under the sun. She put heart into it; whenever she said it, she was gentle, caring to the word. But it was like a light switch with her, he realized now. She can just turn it on and off at will. "If I'm going to go pouring my heart out to someone, you're not exactly high on the list." She went to the trunk and grabbed her suitcase before going to shut the cab door. "Go back home, Will." Harsh, coarse, nowhere near the way she had said it in Shelter Island. "You don't need to be here anymore."

And as quickly as she relaxed against his touch, she was gone.

Karen only slowed her pace when she got through her front door, too frazzled to even remember to close the door behind her. Funny how perception can change in the course of a weekend. She always knew that Will was dependable—it was the sole reason she asked him to accompany her—but with their history, she figured there would be a hint of annoyance about it. She had no reason to expect anything more; she hadn't necessarily been the greatest person to him, and although she never truly meant anything she said, there was no way to let him know that. She realized now that she had let too much of herself show, and that snap of her attitude towards him was a feeble attempt to restore the peace—or lack thereof—that had been established before the weekend.

But in all honesty, she wished she could have fought off whatever it was inside her to make her demean him, and instead invite him in.

She dropped her suitcase at her feet—she'll take care of it in the morning—and made her way towards the stairs.

"Karen."

He was standing in the open doorway, suitcase in hand, with a look on his face that she swore she had seen before. God, when was it? As he stepped closer, her concentration faded. All she wanted was to feel the security she felt before, trusting him to keep her secrets. But as he moved towards her to the point that mere inches separated them, that little nagging piece of her wouldn't let it go.

"I thought I said you don't need to be here." Small, half-hearted to the point where she didn't even believe herself when she said it. In that moment, she thought he was going to leave. He even took a step back from her, as if it wasn't the things she said before that hurt him, but this. He was going to leave, he's headed for the door right now, she could tell.

He still had that look on his face. Once she truly thought about it, she could place it. She had seen that look earlier. It was on the dance floor, right before he kissed her under the spotlight. She wasn't even sure if he was aware of it. It was a look of a mix of confidence and trepidation. It was almost as if he knew what he wanted to do, but the fear of her rejection was what was holding him back.

"I'm sorry…" she said in a whisper.

Will shook his head but said nothing. For a moment, Karen didn't think he heard her. She just watched him as he turned his back and started to walk away. When she couldn't look anymore, she shifted her gaze to the floor. Of course. She never knew when to stop. Control was something she could never seem to get a good handle on. She had it in the most insignificant, trivial situations, but when it truly counted, she could never make it go the way she wanted. She knew if she said something, they would go back to the way they were in Shelter Island; she was just beginning to warm up to the idea, and as soon as it started to become familiar, she pushed it away.

She looked up from the floor, expecting to see the room empty, save for her suitcase.

What she found was Will moving in towards her.

What she felt was his lips pressing against hers.

And she knew she wouldn't ask him to leave anymore.


	3. 1:25 pm

**1:25 pm**

Twelve hours. All it took was twelve hours. She felt like she went through the rollercoaster ride of a relationship in double time, only to be let off completely windswept and shaken. She had been through it countless times before with people who didn't mean nearly as much. The speed making her knees weak. The trek uphill exhilarating but frightening at the same time, anticipating the downfall. The decent moving much too fast, and she wants to do everything in her power to make it last, but the car only follows the rail. And when it's over, she has that feeling as though she's been through hell and back, only to walk away from the scene like it's nothing.

Except this time, it's everything.

In twelve hours, she felt it all: confusion, surprise, joy, passion, love (could they even call that love?), annoyance, anger, fear, desperation, loneliness, absence. Some she felt one after the other, some all at once. She wished she could say that if she could go back and do it all again, she would. She wanted to say it. Karen hadn't felt so alive as she did entwined with Will. It was like the rollercoaster crawling uphill, his fingers sliding along her spine, his breath upon her skin. Exhilarating. Frightening. In those moments, she forgot a downfall was even possible. In those moments, it was only them, the rest of Manhattan, the rest of the world, shut out of the place that only they were allowed access to. In those moments, she felt beautiful, she felt wanted. In those moments, it all felt natural. It didn't feel as though they were violating some sort of code—oh, no, those two would never hook up, that's just common sense; it wasn't like that.

That is, until the decent.

Karen couldn't stay in the house. There was too much there to deal with—not only what she had laid down with Will, but the things she had created with Stan that were now collecting dust. She grabbed her coat and her purse and wandered out into the city. The bitter cold stung her skin, but at least she was feeling something new, something physical to take her mind off of the emotional. She fished around in her purse for her pack of cigarettes and lit one, let the smoke fill her lungs and hoping that when she exhaled, the events of the morning would go along with it.

She had made her way to the southern part of Central Park, heading into Midtown, before her cell phone rang. God. As much as she loved Jack, she was just not in the mood for him right now. One of two things could happen if she told him: he would either express his disgust with the idea, or he could surprise her with one of his occasional but entirely genuine bouts of deep and thoughtful conversation. And frankly, she wasn't sure if she would be able to survive either of them. But when she looked at the screen of the phone, she froze.

_Calling: Will Truman_

Damn.

If she had been back at home, she might have been more willing to answer. But not out here. Not out in public. Not in one of the most tourist-ridden, crowded areas of New York City. Karen wasn't even comfortable with her own knowledge of their…was it even a crime? She didn't want any of those nosy people watchers in on the secret as well. She let the call go to voicemail. A few moments later, she felt a vibration from her phone, and figured it was his message.

No voicemail. Just a text.

_Where are you?_

Three simple words, but they rattled her. It felt like a set-up, an invitation to ride the rollercoaster again. But it was such a harrowing experience the first time, she wasn't sure if she was ready to strap herself in again. He obviously was thinking about this morning, too. And on some level, she honestly wanted to see him again. But she knew that if she saw him so soon, she wouldn't be reliving the beginning of the morning. She'd be reliving the part when he left. She'd be reliving the decent. And she wasn't ready for that.

She slipped the phone back into her purse without responding, grabbed another cigarette and lit it. Tomorrow. Maybe tomorrow, she'd be able to tackle it.

But she doubted it.

* * *

"Hello? Karen?"

The door was unlocked. Ten hours ago, she told him that if he wanted to stop by after work, it would be unlocked for him to just walk in. But he knew this wasn't the reason now. The place had an eerie silence; a home teeming with help behind the scenes should never be this quiet. He figured Rosario would come around to see what the commotion was about, but he heard no footsteps, her voice was absent. He was what he wanted to make sure Karen wasn't.

He was alone.

Will walked up the stairs towards the bedroom. Earlier, Karen had taken him by the hand and led him to this place with a soft touch and an enticing smile on her face. Now he was walking towards it in a plea of redemption. He never meant to leave like that. Everything just took him by surprise. That one little pull in the fabric of this dream, that one reminder that reality is never this sweet, is what brought him down. That's what caused the decent. And even though he knew what her life entailed, it still came as a shock when it made its way into their world.

Opening the bedroom door revealed a perfectly made bed, any trace that he had occupied this space obliterated; Rosario must have come in and fixed it up for Karen. Did she even know what went on in this room? Karen wasn't here; she must have stepped out for a minute. Will took his phone from his pocket and dialed. Her voice came through the other end of the phone, and for a moment, there was hope. But it died as soon as it was created.

"Hi, this is Karen Walker. Leave a message, and—"

Will hung up before the tone. He couldn't talk to her like that. Not through voicemail. He shot off a text, hoping that would get a response.

_Where are you?_

It was all he could say. He wanted her to answer. He wanted to see her. He wanted to make it right. Until then, he would stay here and hope that she would come back soon. He wasn't going to miss her. Will felt as though he had just been on a rollercoaster—the events of the last few hours a complete whirlwind—and he was in line for his ticket to ride once again.

But come on, Will. Do you really want to go through this again?

Of course. He wouldn't be here if he didn't.

If he really was the man that walked out on her this morning, he'd be able to shake it off and go about his day. But there was something about her that made him want to try. She let him in twelve hours ago. And he wasn't about to leave until he was able to do all he could.

Even if it meant waiting another twelve hours.


	4. 1:54 am

**NOTE:** Lyrics to the song "An Unusual Kiss" by Melissa Etheridge are featured in italics before the beginning of the chapter. I do not own the song.

_"Was it the talk or the drink or the dance that led to this?  
Was I so naive presuming the innocence?  
Well, it's 1:54  
And it's such an unusual kiss."_

**1:54 am**

_Wait a minute. Just stop yourself,_ she thought. She moved away from his touch to the foot of the bed, a wave of guilt, a wave of conscience, taking her under. His shirt was on the floor—she had tossed it aside after she slipped it over his head. Her blouse was unbuttoned—Will's handiwork once he realized he had the green light. It was when his fingers ran over her skin that she fully realized what was taking place, that she made the move to stop it.

"Is something wrong?" he asked.

She shook her head in a way that she knew wouldn't ease his mind. But right now, she wasn't necessarily concerned with his. It was her own that would not stop running.

_Look at what you're doing. Look at who you're with, for god's sake. What button did you press that suddenly made this okay? How did we get here?_ Not the most opportune time to figure this out, but he was here now. She didn't get those few moments to herself to regroup. When else was she supposed to do it?

_Was it the talk?_ God, she hoped not. Will didn't say anything about it, but when Karen was asking him to stay for the dance, she couldn't help but feel that she exuded desperation. The last thing she wanted this to result from was pity. But all of that seemed to be forgotten once they were out on the dance floor. True, she opened up to him, no matter how slightly. Inch by inch, she had let her guard down, and he seemed to relax and warm up to this new side of her. But maybe it was too new; so new that they didn't know what to do with it.

If this is what happens every time she lets her guard down, maybe she should rethink doing it in the first place.

_The drink?_ No. This couldn't be it. True, Karen won't turn down a drink. And she'll even admit that she consumes more than others—call it a coping mechanism, call it a crutch, call it whatever you want. But even under the influence, she knew what she was doing. She couldn't blame the drink. She was completely in control. On some level, she had to have wanted this.

_The dance?_ This is what she'd put her money on. The way he kept her in his arms as they swayed under the spotlight; it was gentle and light, but secure. And when he locked his eyes with hers, they were filled with the light of his smile, and it was genuine. And then the kiss…that was what threw her. He swore it was only so the onlookers had something to gossip about the next morning. But she felt something else in his lips. Sincerity. Want. And she hadn't felt that in anyone in a long time.

She may not be sure what caused it, but she sure as hell knew what the result was.

"Are you sure you want me here?"

Karen was seated at the edge of the bed when she looked back at Will on the other side of the mattress, his lips tinted red from her lipstick. Did she really think nothing would happen? There was truth in what she told him; he was the only one she could depend on. Which was why she figured they would just get through the weekend, return to Manhattan, and get on with their lives. Maybe it was a little naivety creeping around in her.

The look on his face showed genuine concern. She could tell he wanted to be here. She could tell he wanted to be with her. She tried to lighten up, no matter how feeble an attempt it actually was.

"Will, if you were going to ask, the right time would have been _before_ I brought you up here."

He laughed, made a move towards her to grab her hand. It was so simple yet so foreign. So loving yet so terrifying. She knew she was the one to bring him up to her bedroom; after their kiss—it was such an unusual kiss—Karen lingered in his arms for a moment, trying to process what just happened while at the same time taking in her surroundings in order to preserve this in her mind. But it only hit her now exactly where they were. The same room she spent countless nights with Stan. The early years of their relationship when he'd wait until he told her he loved her to close his eyes. The middle years when she could still press up against him as she slept and he didn't mind it. Recently, it wasn't the same. But there was still something sacred in it.

But now, it's been months since she shared a bed with him. Now, it was beginning to feel like she had always slept alone. _Was it really so bad to let someone else in?_ she thought.

"Karen, I don't want you to do anything you don't want to."

She couldn't believe him. For four years, she had done nothing to him to make him think she was a decent person. She called him every name in the book, and when she ran out of ideas, she started the cycle all over again. She crossed him at every chance. But now, it was as if none of that had happened. As if the last four years didn't take place. As if they had just met under different circumstances, and it turns out they'd like to stick around a little longer. Karen didn't know what else she could do.

She moved towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressed her body up against his.

His fingers traveled up her spine, against the fabric of her blouse. He gave her chills. He wrapped her in closer as she whispered to him.

"Why are you being so good to me?"

It was a question that shocked even her when she let it slip. She closed her eyes as she laid her head against his shoulder. Maybe he didn't hear. Maybe he won't respond. Just let them stay like this a little while longer before she wrecks it completely. Because she's bound to wreck it completely.

"Because I think we need each other tonight more than we know."

She looked into his eyes. Karen was surprised by his admission. She had been so concerned with her own neurotic needs tonight, her own frantic reasoning, her own guilt about it all, she never once thought that something might be plaguing Will. It never occurred to her that he might need her; she merely figured that she was the vulnerable one and he was just there by default.

It cast him in a new light.

Nothing more was said. Nothing more needed to be. Karen brushed her lips against his. Their first kiss was an unusual one. This one still had that air about it, but this time it felt different. Against her better judgment, against what anyone else would say if they found out, it felt right.

Karen felt his lips travel from hers, down her neck. To feel someone scouting out the curves of her body, and to know that it was genuine, meant everything to her that moment.

The talk.

The drink.

The dance.

She didn't care anymore.

All that mattered was that he was here tonight.


	5. 2:45 am

**NOTE:** Lyrics to the song "An Unusual Kiss" by Melissa Etheridge are featured in italics at the beginning of this chapter. I do not own the song.

_"The smell, the taste, the touch is so brand new__  
The thrill of the eyes that captured this forbidden view  
It's 2:45, and you'll have some explaining to do..."_

**2:45 am**

"Tell me something about yourself. Something no one else knows."

Karen looked into his eyes once he said that, wrapped in his arms. Earlier, they had made love. Karen had been so used to traveling along the flesh of the one she married, the way he felt, the way he touched her. She had become so used to their routine that she forgot about anything else. But then she felt Will's lips against her stomach, the way his fingers moved along her curves, the warmth of his skin against her own. She felt like another person, someone who didn't have to deal with the weight her world contained. Karen moved with him with an ease and a grace she only had in the period of time between her failed marriages. She didn't have to worry about keeping up appearances, about how her spouse was going to look. She didn't have to worry about embarrassing him by her actions.

She felt free.

She hated to think that Stan was a hindrance, but she couldn't figure out how else to explain it.

"Something no one else knows…" she started playfully. It was the conversation after. How serious could it honestly get? She ran her finger along his jaw line, felt a slight stubble trying to creep out. "I love the way you touch me." After she pressed her lips against his, she reached for the cigarettes and lighter on her nightstand and lit one. Karen sat up and let the sheets fall to her waist as she exhaled. He still hadn't said anything. She turned her head to face him, her bare back towards him. "Were you serious?"

The touch of his hand along the small of her back let her know that he was.

Karen watched as the cigarette between her fingers slowly turned to ash. With a sigh, she started.

"When I was seven, I walked in on my mother with a man who wasn't my father. It was two weeks after he died. She saw me out of the corner of her eye, but he didn't notice, so she didn't make a move to get me to leave. After it happened, she never talked about it, she never sat me down to try to explain what I saw. I never brought it up , but it was always there in the corner of my mind. Then when I was fifteen, she said I was old enough to understand why she did it."

"What did she say?"

"She said that she knew he had money, so she kept him around for a little while so that she knew she could support us financially since Dad wasn't around anymore. That's how she said it, too. 'Wasn't around anymore.' Like he only left. Like he was only in another city, another state." Karen looked away and smoked the last of her cigarette in an effort to forget about the tears welling up in her throat. "How can you do that?" she finally said, in such a faint voice she could barely even hear herself. "How can you just act like everything's okay when the one you love is gone?"

_Like what's going on right now?_ She could hear the obvious question lingering over them. They just had sex in the same bed she shared with her husband. True, Stan was very much alive, but on some level, isn't this the same thing? Like mother, like daughter?

Will didn't ask. He merely sat up and wrapped his arms around Karen's waist, rested his lips against her shoulder before speaking.

"Karen, I am so sorry."

It wasn't an apology made out of force, out of habit. It wasn't because that's what you're supposed to say when someone pours their heart out like that. It wasn't because someone needed to fill the space and it was his turn to speak. This was a fully genuine apology. She could hear it in his voice.

"Promise me you won't say anything." Karen still couldn't look at him completely; she had him in the corner of her eye, she could feel him around her, but she still couldn't fully look at him.

"Of course I won't. You can trust me, you know that."

Did she? This newfound relationship—she felt strange using that word to describe them, but she didn't know what else to say—has only been alive for an hour; dear god, how can they go through this much in the course of an hour? She had never before thought of Will to be the one to hold her secrets. What exactly had changed now?

Everything, Karen. Everything changed.

"What about you?" she asked as she looked at him. "What's something that no one else knows about you?"

He smirked. "If I told you now, what would we talk about later?"

The light in her eyes slowly began to return as she gave him a smile. "There's going to be a later?"

"Only if you want there to be."

"What about the others?" She knew that once Jack and Grace got over the initial shock of the fact, they would have an absolute field day with this.

"What they don't know won't hurt them. So we don't tell them right away. What's the harm in that? Why do we need to drag other people into this?"

"Because it's reality, Will." That was a little harsh. She didn't mean for it to sound that way. But he didn't seem taken aback by it.

"You have the power to change your circumstance, Karen," he said softly as he brushed his lips against her cheek. When he offered to bring their suitcases upstairs, she didn't object. "It's not like I'm going to leave anytime soon," he had told her. She lay down on the bed with a sigh, not one of exasperation, but one of happiness. Maybe she could change the circumstance. Maybe she could change reality.

But then the phone rang.

"Who is this?" she blurted in a flash of irritation. It's almost three in the morning. Who the hell would be calling her now?

"Karen, I need to come home."

Oh, god. Karen understood now. Probably some late-night argument with Mom—did she come home later than she should have?—that had her wishing she could leave. So she dialed the number of the one person who could get her out of there.

Why now? Why tonight? Isn't it obvious, Karen? It's a warning. Remember what you have. Remember who you'd hurt.

"Olivia, I can't come for you now. You have to stay at your mother's."

"Why?"

She heard Will's footsteps coming closer and closer. God, she was so close. She could have changed the circumstance. She could have changed reality.

But then the phone rang.

And she realized it was impossible.


	6. 2:17 pm

**2:17 pm**

"I never expected to fall for you. I don't even know if that's what you can call it. Everything happened so quickly. I mean, one moment, I'm completely disgusted with you for what you did to me at the start of the weekend. Making everyone think I was some sort of escort. But in a split second, you break down the wall that was keeping me out all this time, all these years, and you show me a woman I've never seen before. You intrigued me. And I didn't want to let it go. Maybe that's why I couldn't leave you alone last night.

"There have been cracks in the wall, so much so that I could see through them a couple times. And to be honest, on some level I've felt the same way I do now. But never like this. There was always something before—surprise, sympathy, maybe a little bit of pity—but it was always a platonic something. And as soon as I could figure out what that something was, you had fixed the crack in the wall, and it was standing there, stoic and flawless, once again.

"I didn't realize that with this crack, it would bring down the entire foundation that I knew to be Karen Walker.

"You always seemed to be one of those people who were off limits—not just to me, but to everyone around you who wasn't in your circle. We could always look but never touch. Last night, you let me in, and I wondered how many people before me have seen this. Maybe Stan when you're in the privacy of your own home, maybe the ones who called you their wife before. But it can't be many more. And I'm privileged to be one of them.

"I just wish I would have proved that to you.

"Nothing can ever excuse the way I left. Even in the middle of our worst meeting, I have never walked out on you. And I am so sorry that I chose to do this in the middle of one of our best. I knew what I was getting myself into when I spent the night with you. It just didn't hit me until a few hours in. And I didn't know what to do with myself. Everything became real, and at that point, I didn't think I could handle it.

"Please don't get me wrong. I wanted it to be real. You have to believe me, I wanted it to be real. It's just that everything up until then was so incredibly dreamlike, it was impossible for me to figure out what to do with what you handed me.

"You don't have to believe me.

"I just needed to tell you all of this before you write me off completely.

"I never expected any of this, and I'm sure you didn't either. All I know is that I hate the way I left things. And, if you'll have me, I'd like to stick around. Just let me know what I can do to make it right again."

Silence.

It needed a little fine-tuning, but he'd say something along those lines to her when she gets back.

Will had been here for almost an hour, waiting for her to show up. A few times, he could have sworn he heard footsteps, but they died down as quickly as he heard them, and he figured it was only some of the help that had to be around here somewhere. He lay down on Karen's bed, the same side he was curled up in a few hours earlier. He wondered what Grace would think if she saw this; he had completely blown her off for lunch so he could see Karen, only to find that she wasn't home. And instead of trying again later, he's been waiting inside, hoping she wouldn't kick him out as soon as she saw him.

He was hoping she wouldn't leave.

What did he really expect her to do when she saw him, anyway? Run into his arms and tell him it was okay, she was just happy he came back? Tell him that they can figure out a plan of action, so that they can see each other again? Seriously, Will. Do you really think she'll be so forgiving?

He hoped so. He really hoped so.

He'd just have to wait and see.

* * *

_I never expected to fall for you. I don't even know if that's what you can call it. Everything happened so quickly, and of course my ego had to get in the way in the beginning. Lying about who you truly were to everyone at the hotel. You wouldn't expect any less of me in any other situation. But I didn't have to do that then, when you were giving me such a huge favor. You didn't want me to be alone that weekend. And when I realized how I hurt you, I wanted to make it right. You didn't have to be there. I didn't have to demean you._

_After a while, I knew I could trust you. And you were everything I had imagined you would be. Without all of that hostility, and the warring words, we were different people. Both of us._

_I liked it._

_If I had taken the time to see who was on the other end of that phone, I would have let it slide. If I knew it would make you leave, I wouldn't have picked up. You shouldn't have to be pulled into my mess. You shouldn't have to try to clean up what I've done. And I would never ask you to._

_But it was just nice to be with you, no matter how short our time was._

_I want to hate you for leaving like that. It would be so much easier if I could hate you for that. But I know that if I hated you, there would be no chance of what happened before ever happening again. And nothing in my life that was ever worth it was easy._

_I never expected any of this, and I would bet all I had on the fact that you didn't, either. All I know is that since you left, all I wanted was to feel your caress on my skin._

It needed a little fine-tuning. But she could figure it out before she calls.

The fresh air had cleared her mind a bit, made her focus. And wanting to talk to Will tomorrow turned into "I should really do this today; he shouldn't be left hanging." She knew she had to. It just wasn't as simple as it sounded.

If Karen knew how to meet with him in person without anyone else getting suspicious, she would in a heartbeat. Just to see him again. But she'd have to get through people who she didn't want in on their secret. And then there was the chance that he would refuse to see her. Yes, he called, but maybe that was merely a lapse of judgment.

She took a cab back to her place. It was too cold to make the journey back uptown on foot. She wouldn't call just now; give it a few minutes. Let her think about anything else she wants to say.

She just hoped that he would be willing to hear it.

The cab pulled up to the curb and let her out at her home. When she walked through the front door, she didn't know what to do with herself. Karen still couldn't muster up enough courage to call him now. She just needed to relax a bit.

She held onto the rail and went up the stairs towards her bedroom.


	7. 3:17 am to 4:23 am

**NOTE:** Lyrics to the song "An Unusual Kiss" by Melissa Etheridge are featured before the beginning of this chapter, and after the break, in italics, as well as in the dialog. I do not own the song.

_"It's 3:17 am. Please let me into your eyes"_

**3:17 am**

_Karen, I can't take it anymore! I come home just a little late, and she's on my case about it. It's always like this every time I'm over here, Dad never does this. Please, I can't stay here._

Will's lips graced the nape of her neck as her mind raced. She hated being so harsh and short with Olivia earlier, but there was no way she could keep her here; not only because of Will, but because she was never the maternal type, and would so quickly fail Stan in a way she never wanted to. She had told her step-daughter to sleep it off and in the morning, she'll be fine. Olivia had hung up the phone in anger. And Karen couldn't keep it away from the forefront of her mind.

It took him a long time to notice; he was more concerned with the warmth of her skin as he kissed it. She didn't help matters much; she went through the motions so she wouldn't have to explain anything. But when he did notice, he saw that the light in her eyes—eyes that weren't focused on him—that was there once before had gone out. And for a moment, he was convinced that it was because of something he had done. Maybe he pushed her too far, maybe he coaxed her into doing too much, more than she was comfortable with; although she never seemed like a woman who had limits, his perception of her had changed so much over the past few hours that he wasn't even sure anymore.

"Hey," he said quietly, soothingly. She looked at him vacantly. "Where are you?"

"I'm right here." It was half-hearted, hardly considered a passable response. And she could tell that he didn't buy it.

"Let me into your eyes. What's troubling you so much?"

She didn't want to say anything, hoping to spare him what she had been feeling for over an hour now. Lead him off the path. It's the least you can do.

"You don't need to worry about it, Will."

"If you're concerned, I'm worried. It's not anything I did, is it? I don't want to be the one to hurt you."

She gave him a little smile and half a laugh. "Of course not," she said as she graced his cheek with her hand. "Of course you didn't do anything. You've been perfect. You've been so good to me. Better than I deserve, actually."

"You deserve the best of everything, Karen."

Her smile faded as quickly as it appeared. "Please don't say that. I really don't."

"Why not?"

Could she really tell him? He'd been so good about everything else tonight. Maybe she was over thinking his reaction. Maybe he could help her rationalize and forget it. Maybe…

"Karen?"

She started out with a sigh.

Then she began to tell him everything.

* * *

_"4:23, and I try to hold on as you rise  
I'll give you all that I have, if that's what you want me to try" _

**4:23 am**

"Will, please say something."

He had been silent for what seemed like an eternity. She could have brushed the call off—she should have brushed it off, and said that it was no big deal—but she saw no reason to lie to him anymore. Not after the last few hours. But she could tell that her reasoned bout of honesty might have derailed anything they had going on.

"I don't know what else to say about it, Will," she continued. "I can't lie to you. And I know you wouldn't want me to."

Silence.

"God, honey, I wish you'd say something."

Will looked at her for a moment before he finally spoke.

"I can't."

"I can give you a few minutes if you need them."

"No, that's not what I mean. I can't do this anymore." The words she had been dreading, and he said them.

Will started to get up from the bed. He had one foot on the floor when Karen grabbed a hold of him. "No, don't," she cried out helplessly. "Please don't leave me here, like this."

"I don't know what else to do, Karen. You just made it real. Everything outside of this room is real now. Our friends, your marriage. The fact that you have step-kids, for god's sake! What do you expect me to do?"

"I don't have psychic abilities, Will! How the hell was I supposed to know Olivia was on the other end of the phone? And you knew damn well what you were getting yourself into. It's not like we just met each other in a bar and decided to just randomly hook up. We've known each other for four years already! You knew about Stan, you knew that kids were involved. Hell, you even knew that we would have Grace and Jack to deal with. I can't help what you choose to believe."

She didn't mean to be so harsh. Immediately, she tried to make it up to him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out like that. Just please, don't go. Please. I'll give you all that I have, if I haven't given it to you already. It really means the world to me that you're here. I don't want to mess it up."

Silence.

He had been silent for what seemed like an eternity.

"I don't know what else I can say." They had come full circle with this conversation. They were getting nowhere.

Silence.

"God, honey, I wish you'd say something."

Will looked at her for a moment before he finally spoke.

"I can't."

Karen tried once again to grab a hold of him when he made the move to leave.

Except this time, she couldn't keep him there.

And she watched him grab his suitcase and walk out the door.


	8. 5:26 am

**NOTE: **Lyrics to the song "An Unusual Kiss" by Melissa Etheridge are featured in italics. I do not own the song.

_"It's 5:26 am. I've got nothing left that I can say.  
5:26 am, black and white has melted into grey.  
My baby draws the shades  
As the taxi pulls away..."_

**5:26 am**

Neither of them spoke another word. As soon as Will left the bedroom, suitcase in hand, Karen rushed out of bed to follow him. She knew he could hear her close behind him, her bare feet padding along the floors as they moved from the doorway to the hallway to the stairwell. She made no move to touch him, to grab a hold of him to try and get him to stay. She knew that if she did, her attempt would be futile; he may stop for a moment, but would only brush her off and continue moving towards the front door.

They reached the bottom of the stairs. Four hours ago, he kissed her here. Four hours ago, it all started. Four hours ago, she never would have believed that she'd be back here again, watching him leave.

Where Karen stopped in her tracks, Will kept going. She didn't have control of this situation—but, really, did she have any control in this situation to begin with? She knew that nothing she could say would make him change his mind. It was hopeless. She was hopeless.

Will made it to the front door and opened it. He stopped to turn his gaze towards Karen, still at the bottom of the stairs. Her eyes—damn, those eyes. So much sadness, so much disappointment, but not an ounce of hatred. There wasn't enough room there for hatred. The look on her face almost made him want to walk back, to scoop her up into his arms and tell her that he was so sorry for making her suffer, before taking her back to the bedroom.

But he couldn't. He just couldn't.

Instead, he walked through the front door, and shut it gently behind him.

Karen rushed to the front door, thawed out of her frozen state by the stairs, as he walked out, hoping she could catch the door before he shut it.

But she couldn't. She just couldn't.

Instead, she pressed her body to it for a moment, taking the past few minutes in. Then she made her way back upstairs to her bedroom.

She made her way towards the window and looked down on the street below. Underneath the streetlight, she watched the late night/early morning traffic speeding by before she saw a cab pull up to the curb and come to a stop. A figure opened the back door, threw a suitcase inside and looked up.

It was Will.

He stayed there, staring up at the building; he no doubt could see Karen in the window, looking down at him. She stayed within view, as if speaking to him through the glass. _I dare you to leave. Look at me now and tell me you're anxious to go._

But soon enough, she broke. She realized she wouldn't be able to watch him leave if, and when, he finally got into the cab. So she did the only thing she could do.

She drew the shades and climbed into bed.

When she woke up, she was supposed to visit Stan in prison. She was supposed to tell him all about the weekend, and go through the motions of the good wife, the faithful wife, the supportive wife. She had no idea how she was going to do that. Maybe she would skip this visit; she knew she had good reason to, but there was no explaining that to Stan. So she would just go back to work. But there, she'd eventually run into Will; he was always there, chatting up Grace, picking her up to go to lunch. And if she stayed here, she would have the memory of what just happened haunting her.

She didn't know what to do.

So she tried to fall asleep, clinging to the hope that in the morning, she would be able to put all of this behind her.

* * *

She jerked awake when she heard the front door slam and rubbed her eyes. "What the hell?" The electric red of her alarm clock screamed at her, letting her know that she had a good two hours before she had to get up and get ready for work. "God," she groaned. Getting out of bed, she half-heartedly wrapped a robe around her body and padded her way towards the door. When she opened it, she found Will across the hall, opening the door to his own bedroom.

"Hey," she muttered in a sleep-heavy voice.

He jumped at her voice before he turned to face her. "Hey," he answered back. "I didn't mean to wake you."

Grace gave him a smile with her eyes half open. "It's okay, don't worry about it. Welcome home." She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before what she said had fully settled in. "Wait, did you just get back now?" Grace had originally assumed Will couldn't sleep and went out for a walk. But come to think of it, she never heard him come into the apartment before now. She knew she went to bed early, but she would have been able to hear that.

"Yeah. I know it's late. Go back to bed."

"I thought Shelter Island was somewhere around Long Island." God, here it comes. The barrage of questions, suspicions. He didn't want to suffer this, especially this late at night. All Will wanted to do was go to bed and forget the events of the last few hours, get some rest before the start of his work week, but Grace wasn't having any of it.

"It is. Go back to bed."

"Well then why are you just getting back now?"

"It's a long story. I don't want to talk about it right now."

"Tell me."

"Go back to sleep. You have work in the morning."

"So do you. Tell me."

"Grace, I'm not doing this now. I want to go to bed."

He walked into his bedroom and shut the door behind him. He waited until he could hear Grace do the same, and then changed his clothes before climbing into bed. In a few hours, he would have to be in his office, he would have to be a functioning person. He would have to focus on his clients, and push his personal life to the back of his mind. He would have to go to Grace's office to meet her for lunch, like they always did. He would have to see Karen. He would have to pretend like nothing happened between them. He would have to continue warding off the telling of the story Grace so desperately wanted to hear. The coming day would be asking so much of him.

He hoped that he would be able to make it through the day when he woke up.

He hoped that when he closed his eyes, he wouldn't see Karen's own sad ones, pleading with him to stay.


	9. 2:53 pm

**2:53 pm**

"Oh my god."

As soon as Karen saw him, lying on her bed, everything she had planned to say to him went out the window. Instead, all she could think about was the quick downward spiral of their time together. The hurt he put her through when he left. And she started to make her exit.

"Wait, wait. Karen, please don't go. I need to talk to you." She didn't turn around. She couldn't look at him. Not yet. Will started to speak again.

"Look. I know I didn't leave things well. I know that you probably can't forgive me. But you have to understand. In that short amount of time, I had gotten so used to it being you and me. Only you and me. I didn't want to have to share you with anyone else. So when you told me that Olivia called, it made me realize that I had to. It made me realize that you had already pledged your love to someone else, and even if you don't feel completely the same way you did about him, I would have to share you anyway. And I didn't think I could handle that. That's why I left. But since I did, I have not been able to stop thinking about you. I want to stay with you. I want to make it right."

It wasn't really like what he planned to say to her. But it was all he could get out.

After he finished, she turned to face him for the first time since she saw him on her bed.

"Will…"

Karen stopped for a moment, unsure of what to say. Everything she had thought up until this point had meshed together so that she couldn't make out what she wanted to get out and what she wanted to forget. She tried the best she could.

"I would be lying if I said I wasn't thinking of you. I don't want to say I've fallen for you, because it was only a few hours. But I've certainly cast you in a different light. And I truly believe everything you just told me."

Silence.

"There's a 'but,'" Will said. "I can feel it."

"But I don't think I can do this anymore."

The look on his face was one of shock that was masking a hint of broken-heartedness.

"What do you mean, you can't do this anymore? Why not?"

"Because we wouldn't be able to break the cycle! Look, the way you made me feel last night…there aren't enough words to describe it. I hadn't been so alive in years. But as soon as something from our outside life came sneaking in, you switched so quickly, I couldn't even recognize you. You had turned from someone who told me he wouldn't hurt me into someone who leaves at the first sign of complication. I'm not saying I'm perfect. We all know I'm far from it; I've made more mistakes in my life than I care to think about. But it goes both ways, Will. So I slipped and let my actual life get in the way of the one we pretended to have for a few hours. But at least I tried to make you stay after it happened."

"Karen…"

"Honey, please. Let me finish."

Will nodded.

"Maybe if it were under different circumstances, maybe if this happened at a different time, we could really take the chance and pursue this. I just don't want to keep being heartbroken if we start up, only to be reminded of real life again. You can't tell me that it will never happen again."

A few moments went by before someone spoke again.

"You know what?" Will finally said in a quiet voice. "You're right. I can tell you until I'm blue in the face that it won't happen, but I can never really promise it. Maybe there's really something here between us. But I don't want to be disappointed every time I realize there are strings attached. And I don't want to be the one who continually hurts you. You've had enough of that; the last thing I want to do is add to it."

Silence.

"We have got to be the king and queen of bad timing."

At Will's remark, Karen suddenly burst out laughing. "That's the understatement of the year." She could hear Will join in the laughter, the first smiles they had given each other since the morning. "Oh…" Karen let out as her laughter died down. "So what are we going to do?" It wasn't a heavy question like it possibly should have been. She wasn't angry at him, and he let out a huge sigh of relief.

"Well…" Will gave this some thought. "I guess we'll just go back to the way things were. What else can we do? Grace and Jack have no idea what's going on. They're going to expect us to have the same connection we've always had between us."

"Maybe we could be a little more civil towards each other in public. Gradually, of course."

Will smiled at her. "I can definitely do that. You know you can count on me if you need anything. I'm not going to turn you away."

He grabbed her hand. She weaved her fingers with his.

"I know, honey."

Will let a few moments pass. "Karen, can I ask you something?" She nodded. "Can I stay here tonight? Just for the night. To make up for how I left things."

Karen stared at him for a minute. She wasn't sure what would come of one more night with him. For all she knew, their minds could change completely, and they'd be willing to take the risk together. For all she knew, they were just continuing the cycle they started thirteen hours ago. She had no idea where this would lead them.

But she was willing to find out.

She nodded again. "I'd like that."

The smile on his face grew wider when he heard her acceptance. He pulled her into his arms and felt her wrap around his neck. He was going to make it right. She felt his caress on her skin. It was all they wanted.

They didn't have a clue what lay ahead of them. They didn't have a plan for the future.

But they had tonight.

And that's all that mattered.


End file.
